Sunday, March 30, 2008

That millie...

I just don't think I can stand it - that millie is just sooooo adorable! Yesterday, it seemed that she just didn't know what she is about.

Which is not a total surprise, of course. But still.

Like a duck to water, she is. When she called - not the first time in the past week, mind you - she could barely speak. It's like that sometimes with many people. They've called before, and the conversation somehow took them to a place that was unfamiliar, uncharted, except in thoughts they would never dream of verbalizing. And sometimes, when they call back they're virtually, well, not quite pre-verbal... I mean they're not infants or anything... but there's this terribly sweet disconnect between a feeling they can't quite put their finger, or tongue, on and a burning need they have to be understood.

And so it was. Sweet, demure millie. She could barely bring herself to let me know who it was that was calling! When I realized the situation, I had her relax a bit. Maybe more than a bit, and before very long at all she was able to answer simple questions. Did she like it when I called her millie? Did it feel nice when we (oh, okay, when I) talked about how nice it is to feel the hose glide up over one's legs, the lovely constricting tightness... that made all her troubles seem to go away, pushed back into some dark crevice that was hidden from view?

So many things. So very many things she'd never really thought of before. she couldn't quite bring herself to articulate, but it was clear that there were just so many things she wanted, so many things she needed. I mean, it was just so obvious. When the hose were on snugly, and she was safely tucked away, she began to come out of her shell a little. To open up. Now, I don't think that my having her slide her fingers down over the hose and between her tightly clenched legs had everything do to with it. But somehow, knowing that no one would see it, that it wouldn't up and embarrass her, unexpectedly, just seemed to calm her and let her open up...

Just like the sweet, little slut she is becoming should.

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